Sunday, May 6, 2012

Growing Up Scared

Growing up scared - or scared of when she'll grow up.  My eldest, QueenBee, has always had attention issues. Mostly she has trouble transitioning, but also missing details.  Generally details that don't matter, but occasionally, there is a whopper.

Today, she wanted mac-n-cheese, so she got out one of the instant single serving packets, and read the instructions.  No worries - she is a wiz at math, no issues with measuring, understands microwave oven safety.  I step out of the room for 2 minutes and come back to smoke pouring out of the microwave.  She hadn't added the water.  No water, just microwaving dry noodles in a bowl.  A bowl now cracked, the noodles almost ash.

I was so flabbergasted, that aside form running around opening doors and windows before I rush the cremated remains outside, I didn't even yell.  Just told her to read the directions again until she figured out what she forgot.  After a few reads, a soft, "oh...."

Yeah, "oh" - I mean, not a tragedy - no one was injured.  But what about when we move on to things more dangerous than microwaves?  The idea of her driving a car gives me a deep clenching feeling in the pit of my stomach.  How can she possibly figure all those buttons and knobs?  The girl who overthinks bike-riding so much that every time she looks at an obstacle, she crashes into it?

Maybe she will outgrow this....but my hopes are slim.  She comes by this honestly.  My dear husband, who thinks and operates much like QueenBee, in a non-linear fashion, told me about the time he changed the tires on his step-mother's car - and forgot to reattach the lug nuts.

God help us all - stay off the sidewalks in 7 years.


  1. Deep breaths. 7 years is a long way away. You have time. :)

  2. You of course know that I totally get this -- I have one, possibly two, of my own. Sometimes I wonder if this is where the dumb blonde jokes come from. Is it just a bunch of people who happen to be absent minded professor types? Maybe she can move to a city with really good mass transit.

  3. Her younger cousin recently attempted to make toast in the toaster oven with the bread on a plastic plate. I was getting dressed and heard a weird popping sound downstairs and walked into the plate cracking in half in the toaster. Thank goodness she had decided it wasn't a good idea to touch it after she opened the toaster. She then said, "I guess the plate shouldn't go in there."